My mom and I fight about contacts a lot. I use one-day lenses and take good care of my eyes, but my mom thinks I'm going to get scratches and eventually go blind. Once, she BEGGED me, but I CAN'T wear glasses. Yes, vanity, I know. But I feel so ugly in them (overdramatic, I know) and I do know I look very different. I think she's overreacting. Today, she was complaining again and I got annoyed and told her I'm not going to listen and that she's making a big deal out of nothing. She started SCREAMING at me until I finally escaped into my room. Later, she demanded I go out shopping for new glasses in hopes I'll wear them (not going to work). I was busy and told her no and we got in another fight. She started yelling that she's done trying to be a good mom and started attacking me, shoving and hitting me. I grabbed her arms (partly out of anger, partly out of self defense) and screaming. She kept coming at me, at one point grabbing a chair. She shouted things like "How DARE you grab my arms.Do you know how many Asian children grow up getting hit.It's perfectly normal for parents to discipline their kids like this once in a while. Yes, you're right, I am crazy! I'm always letting you do whatever you want, eating so much candy all the time and wearing contacts." And yes, that was seriously her complaint. I know I'm sassy sometimes, but mostly it's when something like this happens and I'm trying to get her back a few days later. I mean, I don't think she's abusive (psychotic maybe) but I don't understand why I have to go through such drama about something like contacts! Is she right about the danger or is she just out of control?
Added (1). Just for future repliers, I'm fifteen and have no option to move out. :/
Also, this kind of behavior is rare, although it's not her first time and probably not her last.
For more details: http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=607726
So sorry you guys had to read all this.xD
Added (2). Just to clarify, I know my mom will never hurt me.It's scary and an out-of-control kind of anger but I doubt she'll ever permanently injure me or hit my face. If she starts hitting out at me, it's usually my arms or something. She mostly just cusses me out.
Added (3). RokuAku: I agree about the part that she doesn't have to provide me with anything, but the candy I buy out of my own allowance, the computer is from the school, and the contacts… well you're right, but I think I'd buy them myself anyway. I get that that's not the point though. The money's not a problem, my dad earns a lot and my mom is a stay-at-home mom. I do think the time we spend together is straining her, but it's straining both of us. She's somewhat of a "helicopter" mom and I feel suffocated. I know it's not only me because anyone who knows me (relatives, friends) say that she's a bit overbearing. I should definitely be as respectful as I can to her, but we get so frustrated with each other and the moment she calls me a *** or a whore, I'm done trying.In my defense, she's hurt me a lot (I'm sure I've hurt her too) especially with her depression when I was younger and I may have an attitude but I NEVER do anything
Added (4). Wrong. (as in bigger stuff. Never got a detention, never did drugs/alcohol, straight-A students, never with the wrong crowd, at home by 9, never ANYTHING really).It bothers me despite all of this, she thinks I'm terrible because I eat sweets or something. (I don't eat that much candy, I'm perfectly healthy, I'm on the thinner side) I try my best to talk calmly, but I can truthfully say I almost never yell while she almost always yells. The walking away bothers her like crazy but I feel like if I don't she'll never stop shouting and insulting me. Thanks so much for the long response and I'd be very grateful if you have anything else to offer.
billyj: Thanks for the comfort. I do hate the "I can hit you but you can't defend yourself" mentality too.
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