This is just a draft at the moment but I would like some advice on how to make it better please and also from reading this small part do you want to read on? I'm trying not to give to much of the story away at the moment.
I can feel the sweat dripping from my forehead and i can't get the dirt out of my eyes. I can see blood.It's everywhere but I can't move myself to stop it because i'm frozen on the spot. I can see a hand out of the corner of my eye, its lifeless and unattached from a body.
I wake suddenly from the nightmare. When will this stop?
Two days later
I interrogate myself in the mirror while applying some colour to my cheeks. I hate what I've become. I liked it at first, being able to control who I want, when i want but thats changed because i want to be a better person. I quickly put my green contact lenses in and leave my apartment.
As I step outside into the cool breeze of the evening I gather my thoughts. I'm in a new city with new people and a new apartment. This is the start of my new life. There's just one problem. I'm broke financially that's why I have to do this tonight.
См. статью: Please tell me what you think of the start of my book?